I liked this video and these thoughts that I received from one of our schools today, from United Way of Utah County, that if we can meet the needs of our children, they will thrive. Needs include not only physical, but emotional needs as well.
They suggest asking this one questions everyday:
What can I do to help my child feel safe, connected, and confident today?
Here is the Everyday Strong Resilience booklet that United Way produced that you can download with more information on how to nurture your children to help them feel safe, connected and confident. What a great resource!
And here are some of my thoughts on the topic:
I think that creating a home where the Holy Ghost can dwell helps answer those great questions. If the Holy Ghost is in our home, then there is peace. There is love. People feel loved, calm, safe–all things that help us feel safe, connected, and confident.
The Holy Ghost can be in our home when we are trying to live the gospel of Jesus Christ:
- Praying together (as a family, parents and child, or siblings, husband and wife)
- Singing together
- Eating together
- Working together
- Playing together
- Studying the scriptures together
- Resolving problems together
- Serving together
- Learning together
- Repenting together
- Worshipping together
- Exercising together
I notice that TOGETHER is the key word in all of those activities!
Last night was Family Night, and so we did a little service activity. I noticed that everyone was happier when we came home than when we left. It’s that simple! It didn’t take any preparation except a few texts. We gathered what we had, went and shared and visited, and came home.
I had many individually connecting times this past week that strengthened my relationships with my children and husband and helped us all feel safer, more connected and more confident: going to lunch with Peter; driving up to Salt Lake with Anna to visit Sarah and attend the temple together; swimming and running with Lane; talking together in the car after church with Eliza; going to a musical with Rebecca; going on a date with Lane; listening to and enjoying a song that Peter wrote that he shared with me after school; watching a musical with Peter, Eliza and Lane; crying over the phone to Lane as I encountered a challenge; making homemade rootbeer, sloppy joes, and doughnuts with Eliza; emailing back and forth with Julia from her mission; reading a paper of Nate’s for school; texting back and forth with Sarah about Bryan Stevenson’s book, Just Mercy; chatting with Rebecca on the phone about the future; praying over the phone as a family with Lane when he was out of town.
All of these daily occurrences bring us opportunities to connect, to help each other feel loved and safe. Of course we can do better, but I think the main idea is that when we watch out for each other and interact with love and respect, these kinds of daily occurrences help our children feel safe, connected, and confident. It doesn’t take any special training. We just have to keep trying to be like the Savior in the way we listen, are calm, positive, praising, wait patiently, help gently, assume the best, etc. It’s the Christlike attributes and actions that make all the difference in the world!